I have a secret. I am terrified that my boys are going to lose their love for God because their dad is not being the example of a godly man. How will they know how to be a men of God, if they don't have a living example? Don't all little boys want to be just like their daddies? What if they want to be so much like dad that they don't want to go to church anymore or don't want to learn their memory verses anymore or don't want to pray anymore? What do I do? How do I get it across to my husband that they need an example? What is going to need to happen in order for him to get the point? I'm so scared to trust God with my husband and my kids. It seems like it's too out of control. That I don't have any control. Honestly, how can I give God all that responsibility? I know that sounds retarded, but that's how I feel. I "know" He can handle it, but I don't know at the same time. My head knows, but my heart doesn't. I wasn't going to say anything about any of this, but then today's study in "Breaking Free" yelled out at me: Pride says secrets are nobody's business. And we need to get rid of all pride because God hates pride. In order to give glory to him, we need to humble ourselves and pride is the opposite of being humble.
God, help me trust my family to You...I'm scared to leave them in Your hands. Help me surrender.
It's good to see you here! It doesn't sound retarded at all, in fact, I don't think I know a Mom that hasn't struggled with this at some point. I know I certianly have! For me, it's like forgiveness, you may not feel it, you CHOOSE it. I have to say everyday, "God, I know that this was YOUR child long before he was mine, so today while (insert child's name) is at soccer practice, or out with friends, I will trust you to protect him". I pray Psalm 91 over them all the time, but the hardest part is the part where we put them in his hands, and let go. I find this part easiest if I picture Jesus, I close my eyes and picture him there. Only when I am able to see the gentleness in his face, and the care he takes when I place my child in his arms, do I feel safe to let go, and trust my child will be ok. Even still, I have to go back, and CHOOSE this over and over. As for the other, go back and look at last weeks homework. There were Godly kings that had horrible fathers, not saying your hubby is horrible, but if God has a plan, and we know he does, for your children, he will not let one little man stand in his way. (little by comparison to him :) These men did not learn holiness from their earthly fathers, they learned from their HEAVENLY Father, and they learned from their earthly fathers mistakes. He who began a good work in Serena's children will be faithful to complete it! I hope something in here makes sense to you, if not, just know I'm praying. It's a tough one for all of us Mommy's.
ReplyDeletethanks for saying that...it helps to know i'm not the only one. it makes sense in my head - but i'm not there in my heart yet. i never really thought about the kings and how God had a plan for each of them whether their father was a good example or not - that helps.
DeleteGod knows Justin. I believe this will all change. For now, you are being a shining example of God to your kids. I am so excited. I am hoping this is the year that the men see God. There are not enough around. It is no coincidence that the men are joining the bible study this time around, it is no coincidence that we watched Courageous this year....
ReplyDeleteWe will all keep praying. God will never forsake you. He died but he lives. God will also never forsake Justin. He will call him back.
My heart believes so much for this year, I wish I could express it..... It is only January and look what God is doing!!! :)
that is what a pray and hope for everyday....it feels impossible to let that into God's hands - i definitely struggle with it. i'm glad i'm not the only one praying for this. this WILL BE a good year :)
DeleteTara, I wish there was a "like" button here! I agree, although as much as I wish I could see my hubby go to thoses studies, which I can't, if it draws other men, and stirs them up, then they will in turn stir up the other men around them, and who knows what could happen? It's exciting! Have either of you read Stormy Omartian's book, The power of a praying wife? It's so good, and I'm not giving credit to a book, but the year I read it, and put it to work, was when my hubby came to the Lord. Serena, I hope you didn't take my comment as me saying your hubby never would, all I meant was that even if he never did, which is NOT what we're believing for, God will accomplish his plan in your kids, he won't let one man get in the way, and you my dear are sowing seeds of eternity into them every single day. That will not return void! (((hugs)))
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